Tuesday, 23 August 2011

If only pyjamas

Beer and Ice Cream Diet

As we all know, it takes 1 calorie to heat 1 gram of water 1 degree centigrade. Translated into meaningful terms, this means that if you eat a very cold dessert (generally consisting of water in large part), the natural processes which raise the consumed dessert to body temperature during the digestive cycle literally sucks the calories out of the only available source, your body fat.For example, a dessert served and eaten at near 0 degrees C (32.2 deg. F) will in a short time be raised to the normal body temperature of 37 degrees C (98.6 deg. F). For each gram of dessert eaten, that process takes approximately 37 calories as stated above. The average dessert portion is 6 oz, or 168 grams. Therefore, by operation of thermodynamic law, 6,216 calories (1 cal./gm/deg. x 37 deg. x 168 gms) are extracted from body fat as the dessert's temperature is normalized. Allowing for the 1,200 latent calories in the dessert, the net calorie loss is approximately 5,000 calories.
Obviously, the more cold dessert you eat,the better off you are and the faster you will lose weight, if that is your goal. This process works equally well when drinking very cold beer in frosted glasses. Each ounce of beer contains 16 latent calories, but extracts 1,036 calories (6,216 cal. per 6 oz. portion) in the temperature normalizing process. Thus the net calorie loss per ounce of beer is 1,020 calories. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to calculate that 12,240 calories (12 oz. x 1,020 cal./oz.) are extracted from the body in the process of drinking a can of beer.
Frozen desserts, e.g., ice cream, are even more beneficial, since it takes 83 cal./gm to melt them (i.e., raise them to 0 deg. C) and an additional 37 cal./gm to further raise them to body temperature. The results here are really remarkable, and it beats running hands down.
Unfortunately, for those who eat pizza as an excuse to drink beer, pizza (loaded with latent calories and served above body temperature) induces an opposite effect. But, thankfully, as the astute reader should have already reasoned, the obvious solution is to drink a lot of beer with pizza and follow up immediately with large bowls of ice cream.We could all be thin if we were to adhere religiously to a pizza, beer, and ice cream diet.
Happy eating!

Tuesday, 16 August 2011

21st Birthday pyjamas

Yesterday was awesome in some parts and sad and odd in others... Mum had this massive surprise planned in the morning... so I was dragged out of bed WAY too early for a birthday, given lots of nice presents, and some weird ones....including a nice charm of St christopher, on a really thick silver chain. I don't really like the chain, so I'm going to try and get it changed, and I think that's upset mum a bit, but I hope she can see it'd be better if i have something 
I like.... And then we went all the way over to Christchurch, to where the regatta was- funfair and stalls etc, didn't go on them, waited in the car park until an open top bus turned up....and that was my surprise...we were going on a sightseeing tour, complete with commentary, of my home town. So yeh. We spent about 2 and a half hours on this bus, then got off and went for a really nice lunch at one of the other hotels in my chain (so I could get discount) awkward conversation around the lunch table, with everyone on their phones, then had to forgo pudding to get back on the bus to ride home. I suppose she was trying to do something different, but now whenever anyone asks what I did for my 21st I'll have to say I spent the day on a bus.

I'm not insinuating I wanted masses of money spent on me, (talking about money Grandad gave me £40, and uncle chris completely forgot my birthday) I would have been happy with a day in a field with a picnic, but in what universe, does a 21 year old who spent 7 years getting a bus twice a day to school, want to spend her birthday on a FLIPPING BUS!!!! I sound really ungrateful I know.

The afternoon 'party' was not a party, it was mum's friends sitting around a table talking to each other and eating food that we spent ages prepping (on my birthday.) Though when Debbie arrived she did give me a really nice present, which was sweet of her. Everyone else gave me money, which is nice but quite impersonal. 

ANYWAY, in the evening I went to Cafe rouge with my friends, THAT was AWESOME, it was so nice to see everyone, I feel like i've been a flipping hermit with all this work and revision. They were all so chatty, all got on really well, and gave me the most amazing presents, with lovely long messages of love inside every card. I feel so lucky to have such awesome friends, they really saved my birthday :) Got slightly drunk and went home at 12.30 after thoroughly annoying the waitress, who clearly only wanted to go home, but nm! It was lovely, I love them all so much.

Sunday, 7 August 2011

Non-pregnant Pyjamas

Dear men with bad pick-up lines,
How do I like my eggs in the morning? Unfertilized.

Thursday, 4 August 2011

The interface pyjamas

Do you ever notice, that sometimes when people are talking, one person is talking about one thing, and the other is talking about something completely different?

I like to think I can pick up on these things quite well, and usually can step in, in these situations between the Family.

However today I went to the phone shop, and I think maybe phone shop people are a different breed of weirdness with their own language and codes of practice. The guy was REALLY WEIRD. Like not ha ha you're a bit odd weird, which can be awesome- see us for details- but really really, get away from me I would never leave my child within 100 m of you weird.

He had a ponytail, not a problem, tied up in the way that we used to tie ours when we were 8.... with blue and green bands:

  And the inbetweeny sections were really messy, which surely defeats the objective?? Anyway he was also wearing a half undone waistcoat... in a phone shop. BUT his worst crime was definitely that he was a CREEPY SLIMY SPACE INVADER as in one of those people who stands in your personal space, just a couple of inches too close, breathing on you, being too close and making you really REALLY REALLY uncomfortable:

And I don't know If I mentioned that he was CREPY AND SLIMY...... ewwwww. 

Anyway he was also totally useless, and I will be doing my own work to find a new tariff, and probably keep my old phone, even if it is a bit battered...

I also had my teeth removed and re inserted today..... maybe that's why Im feeling a bit cranky, and wasn't in the mood for him.

Finally, I have also remembered why I don't live at home full time....I know you all feel the same... We love you all dearly, lovely family, BUT BALAAGAHAHAGAHAGAHAGAHAGAGAAH. 

That is all. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Tuesday, 12 July 2011

New Job Pyjamas

Last post was quite depressing, sorry.

Feeling better-ish now; did my last shift at the recruitment agency NEVER EVER GOING BACK and have new job as a receptionist in a 4 star hotel! Which is a good job for the summer, but still doesn't really compare to the internships that a lot of others are doing. I would have applied, but you need to know what you're doing first right??

Might want to go into Corporate social responsibility, or something in the NHS with no wrist cutting (bleugh) or maybe event management.... The question is, should I play to my strengths, do what I want to do, or do what I think I should do, which will be harder but probably more worth it in the end...?

Meant to be writing an essay on the Neural crest and how it separated vertebrates from non vertebrates, but CBA.

Missing everyone quite a lot, but I do have to be strict and DO SOME WORK!!!

Saying that...

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2IEztu/www.dumpaday.com/index.php/2011/05/simple-ideas-that-are-borderline-genius-part-8/

Love and getting happier pyjamas :) xxxxxx

Ps. I am special to him :)

Tuesday, 5 July 2011

Poo pyjamas

This is going to be a rubbish summer, I have royally fucked it up for myself, and have no one else to blame. It's my fault I have no money and so have to take any job that is offered to me, and my fault that I can't get the sleep I desperately need because I have to study.

Again.

I really do not feel like not going back to uni. I'd miss the boy and some of my friends but I could just live in Durham with them and not do the whole stupid uni thing. Which would possibly be more upsetting than having to spend the summer cleaning, and revising.

I know I don't have any other option than to go back and finish what I started but...

When the chips are down you really find out who your friends are, and there have been a few, less than welcome, surprises.

Friday, 3 June 2011

Invisible Pyjamas

I realise I have been rather Ignoring my page, possibly through too much to do and think about, but now exams are over, and the summer can officially start I have resolved to try to be a better blogger :)

UK children are the most examined children in the world, not that we can be considered children at the tender age of (nearly) 21.... but still with the exams!!

I have had a MAGNIFICANT Idea for my 21st Birthday; it involves these:





More Details when I have decided more. But YEY, ORGANISING AND PARTIES AND ALCOHOL!!!!

Maybe that's what i should do with my life... don't have any other ideas..... Pyjama shaped love xxxxxxx